THIS. MOTHERFREAKING THIS.
Excuse me as I causally anonymously mail this to all my relatives’ homes
NO “TELEPHONES”. TALK TO EACH OTHER. FACE TO FACE ONLY. WRITE A LETTER. SEND A TELEGRAM TO YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 1860. LIVE.
NO ‘WRITING’… TALK TO EACH OTHER. THROW A ROCK AT YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 10,000 BCE. LIVE.
URGGA. ROU GRAAURH. RUH.
<SMACKS HANDS ON WALL WITH PAINT.>
NO ‘HIGHER BRAIN FUNCTIONS’ …USE YOUR REPTILIAN BRAIN
EAT YOUR MOM’S CORPSE SHE DIED TO PROVIDE YOU WITH SUSTENANCE
PRETEND YOU HAVE JUST AROSE FROM THE SEA
NO “MULTICELLULAR TRAITS”….. USE YOUR SYMBIOTIC MITOCHONDRIA
REPRODUCE ASEXUALLY, YOU’RE YOUR OWN PARENT
PRETEND IT’S 2BYA
NO “LIFE.” USE FUNDAMENTAL PHYSICAL FORCES TO FORM SPHERICAL OBJECTS REVOLVING AROUND ONE ANOTHER IN SPACE.
FUSE HYDROGEN INTO HELIUM USING GRAVITATIONAL PRESSURE TO PRODUCE HEAT AND LIGHT.
PRETEND IT’S 4.5BYA.
STABILIZE INTO EQUILIBRIA
Western Black Rhino officially declared extinct. Good job everyone. Round of applause because the ivory was soooooo worth it.
This is legit and I’m crying.
hE’S SO FREAKING HAPPY.
That is the happiest dog mermaid ive ever seen
if a puppy falls asleep on you youre not allowed to move its illegal
Kanye lyrics improve literally any photoset
IF U EVER FEEL SAD REMEMBER THERE IS A FLOWER CALLED HANGING NAKED MEN AND IT LITERALLY LOOKS LIKE PURPLE MEN WITH THEIR DICKS OUT
ISNT NATURE WONDERFUL
Day 10: Low Treatment. Can you guess my favorite color/flavor of everything?
how the fuck could you do that without getting caught
They like hid hours before the visiting thing closed and climbed up and they’re in jail now but they said it was worth it